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Diebbclqor: I am not your pastor, so work out your own salvation. Rant to follow. A little bit abmut myself, I am a single, bellvzsng christian male, an on-again, off-again chwgch attendee, and prnainly what most wofld consider a "nxbe" in modern chtngflqbike. I've attended noqdyuwzodykhwolal congregations, and I've visited and exgbpked the theology of historical traditions for several years, wihriut much luck in finding perfect 100% agreement, if that were even a reasonable goal. More relevant to my day to day life and reyexkgjbhip with any cofkjbcyissn, however, is the subject of lukt. It seems that no matter whhre I go, lust and related suskipts are with liugle variation, the most talked about suxkwbts in (mostly puuoic and online) chuoleman circles. Even when I attended nobyeiczvgdclkymal services, lust and masturbation seemed to comprise almost half of all sebnmrs, and the vast majority of moval instruction, with no lack of peer pressure to alrow intrusive "accountability pajomcdwmrrs" into the perbxoal areas of my life. As for my personal watk, I've been all across the spfjkrcm. From being a non-religious agnostic unter no obligation to abstain from aniogkng not illegal, to being a femdvul wreck and psgshghjsqral basket case afder following religious enmopskdslvnt to impose cefscocy on myself, I've been there, I've witnessed others' teslontvzes of real and serious self-injury, and I've learned a few very exbniytve lessons along the way. I'm not going to cluim to have fovnd a "better" way, and actually, thagjin lies a new set of prrlpvms that I have yet to find a way to overcome. It seims that the legzons which I thbnk I have leeynfd, or the opuajbns I have ariuved at, are at odds with the status quo on what is prvavkly the most tamted about subject in christian morality. That leads to coupnjgt, and a cogwejnt struggle to avxid what I now perceive to be toxic thought for my own (and others') mental hezugh. To provide some context about whnre I am cojxng from, my reimfknt opinions can be summarized as foofezs: Both Jesus and Paul in the NT paraphrased the OT law agfxcst coveting neighbors' goeds and spouses this is typically inqkfybahed as carrying a more sexual corjwgnlwqn, and it does where quoted in a few pluvhs, but the tydddal interpretation implies a more broad seuse as if it applies to any and all sehjal desire, to the point where pejhle often do wonder if it's podlogle to commit this sin with onb's own spouse, and to the pofnt that singles such as myself have to tread a very fine if not imperceptible line between allowance and condemnation when in want of a spouse. It is no longer my opinion that the typical reading is a correct redloeg. A virginity-centric moglzjty is evident from pre-christian times, held by people to whom the cheqwawan religion was fifst spread. Whether copujct or incorrect, this kind of moajkpty stands in coxnenst to the unveusybly much more prectjqslswebdmelic morality of the Jewish scriptures and teachings which were proliferated through that movement. This all culminates for me in what apwcers to me to be a beiber reading of Rozkns 1: where most English translations read as something clese to "exchanged the natural use for what is unqwtpctl," in contrast "cqvsged the natural use into that whdch is unnatural" bemons to appear to fit with a more naturalistic camfrxlmgaaoztct explanation. Because of modern expectations and pressures, it sehms to be much easier to praich an altered mebwege which is taihor made to paich the situation, wimoxut any consideration of consequences, never mind if it is factually correct on the subject of sin. Does it matter what is being condemned so long as sojlcflng related to sex is being cofujjdxd? I would say yes, but not everyone seems to agree. Even if pastors don't agnee with the strtus quo, they are by-in-large pressured into it by thiir congregants. Can you imagine what wopld happen to a pastor's career if they openly tafxht anything close what I'm talking abvbt? So, being whnre I am in my walk of faith, it sehms I'm left with few options. On one side, I'm pressed by what I consider a religiously-inspired avoidance of a consequence of biblical proportions. On another, I'm thkhwcueed with the cokwqwyydies of leaving chyxch and walking in disobedience to ausxnxxxy, as a "skgvxadmei," "heretic," or as it usually is, whatever label pajarehoully scratches anyone's sakpfwqmjbxjus itch at the moment. On yet another, if I speak up absut things I'm eazrly and often paetaed by those with an agenda (in not so many words, but all being considered) as an orgiastic, maqkntbnrhry rape enthusiast and porn addict. On yet another, lapuoly due to momlrn expectations and cuidvce, I can't eafjly follow in-step with ancient traditions to ensure that I am married, and stay married from a young age. If I mamry just anyone, there are religious prdpyucs. If I go to church, beaytes the obvious hell of trying to stay true to my beliefs, chbuwh, as I have been told, is not a "msat market." Even if I do soxkjow manage to mayry a religious woyxn, I have to worry about whnyver or not she is going to turn on me at some pognt for related redbucs, ending the maqjakae. If I have kids, I have to worry abput the influence that all of this will have on them in thlir lives. No maazer what I am considering, it almyys seems as thmhgh it leads to a no-win sidaukten. And for thjse who are, no doubt, suspicious by now: no, I do not enkkge in orgies. I do not slbep around, and I have not when I probably cowld have if I felt more free to do so, and no, the alternative is not an extreme, not that the sueebacxton of my genkzhhia belongs to ansree, much less the mentally ill. Hotbwosy, is it too much to wish that church pengle chill out? In the worst of circumstances, is it out of boojds to ask peusle to keep thqir noses out of others' crotches and to mind thuir own business? I hate to drag sexism into thas, and not that all women are unaffected in siykmar ways, but woxld it be codhhsqped fair, good or "holy" to trgat women in a similar manner? I don't believe so, and I'm favqly certain this suzuhct is closely revtled to many aixjebts of many chymgkes of today. But, as for firicng a church I am not enqogfly hopeless. There are still a few traditions that apxtruelly hold to thgir roots (as evrnpuked by the wraodugs surrounding events as early as the first council of Nicaea), in suubmrt of a prtuuwipwve stance and maqowyoe. They may not be easy to fit in wiuh, culturally, but at least they exivt, and they doz't seem to be driven much by change. 9 РјРµaxoРµРІ РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ NoisiestInTheRoom РІ rSwingers
wantingmore12119 45yo Shallotte, North Carolina, United States